Methods that helped

With only over 2 years of journey with autism, I have come across various methods that claim to work for children with autism. Here are a few that have worked for Joy. (I have to give credit to her previous Autism center) These are some of the techniques I have learnt from them, and some from books I borrowed from their library.

1. ABA - Applied Behaviour Analysis
- she has learnt so much from this method, though I tend to modify it, to prevent her from feeling that '"Oh, now I have to work, mom's got the therapist look on her face." Nowadays, I will use this method spontaneously all through the day. I do not restrict her to table and chair, or in a closed room, as suggested. Initially (past 2 years) she did go through the rigid setting, to train her compliance, but it's stressful on both of us.

2. Teacch
- a programme to teach independence. I love the structure this gives, but have yet to implement it at home. It requires lots of preparation before and after. It is more or less the same as the 'workbox' system most home schooling parents have been using. (This shows how every child crave and thrive on structure, instead of just children with autism).

3. Occupational Therapy
- There are few things I've learnt from Joy's OT. But she is no longer around for Joy since last year. I managed to glean a little from her and more from books. Here are a few things we did with Joy, when needed)
- Previously, Joy started with sensitivity towards people. She disliked people touching or hugging her (except for me, or her favourite teacher). I learnt to hug her tightly, a few times everyday (though she did struggle for awhile), and after a few weeks, she is no longer too sensitive to touch. She even lets her daddy hug her. There's a theory about reactivating her senses in this, but I am very forgetful when it comes to this. What's more important is that it works for her. Hugging her tightly is not the same as hugging her as we normally do. It was real tight, with massage effect. Tight, loose, tight, loose....
- her motor exercises helped to calm her down, when she is hyperactive, or when she laughs uncontrollably. (we have swings in our living room where she can go to whenever she needs it.) We also let her jump on the bed or even the couch. Actually we have a mini trampoline for her, but I put it away since little brother tends to follow and join in the fun. He was too young at the time. hmmmm, perhaps it's time to take it out again.

4. Speech Therapy
- I learnt a lot from our speech therapist too. The most important characteristic to be a good speech therapist is lots of eagerness and enthusiasm, that could attract children's attention. One has to be patient, and truly sincere in playing with the children to help initiate speech. Yup, I did say play. In my opinion, every parent has the characteristic to be speech therapists. They just have to change their 'I'm an adult' attitude to a child's'. It takes me awhile to do that. And I am still learning - to make a fool of myself , singing, dancing, making silly noises and generally be a 'big' child myself. But of course, being a speech therapist is more than that. They have been trained in various ways and means to reach into the world of children with disabilities. It's really not easy, if you are not interested in this field.

5. Love
- This is the most important. I kiss and hug my children all the time. And I request Joy to kiss and hug me too, throughout the day. I have heart to heart talk with her (with me talking all the time), and convince her that I will not give up helping her reach her greatest potential. (of course, there are times when I am tired and resentful, but these feelings go away and quickly replaced with guilt. I love my baby girl regardless of her condition.)

6. Pray
- I am sure that God is watching over her, and guiding us and other adults around her to do whatever is appropriate to help her reach her greatest potential.

7. Brotherly love and acceptance
- I had to add this in the list. Little Jay has always looked up to his sister. He watched out for her all the time.  He is unconsciously a little therapist in our home. He talked to her, and forced her into his play (in a way only a child could do to another child), quarrelled with her and protected her. He is always aware of his sister's presence and whatever she is doing. Things that he knew we disapprove of, he would stop her or alert us. (though sometimes he'd follow, to try to get attention from us. But he would stop when we reminded him).

* this list is made only from my personal experience and point of view. It is by no means a proper guide.